Valentine’s Day, Love, and Learning to Love Myself

Valentine’s Day has always been about love. Love for a partner, love for friends, love for family. But this year, for the first time in a long time, I find myself single on a day I’ve always associated with deep, consuming love. And sitting here, writing this, I’m holding back tears.

I’ve always been someone obsessed with love. The idea of it, the warmth of it, the way it makes the world feel softer, brighter, full of possibility. I know that I have the capacity to love deeply, to give my heart to someone completely. But this year, I don’t have that person. I don’t have the grand gestures or the late-night whispered “I love yous.” I don’t have the security of a hand to hold or a heart that beats in rhythm with mine.

And that hurts.

But if there’s one thing I know, it’s that love isn’t just reserved for romance. Love exists in the way I cherish my friends, in the way I appreciate my family, in the way I fight for the people and causes I believe in. Most importantly, love exists within me—for me. And maybe this year, that’s the kind of love I need the most.

Loving myself deeply feels like uncharted territory. It means being kind to myself when I want to be critical. It means allowing myself to cry when I feel lonely but reminding myself that my worth isn’t defined by who does or doesn’t love me. It means recognizing that my love isn’t wasted just because it isn’t being given to someone else right now.

So, this Valentine’s Day, I am making a choice. A choice to celebrate love in all its forms. A choice to appreciate the love I already have in my life instead of mourning what’s missing. A choice to look in the mirror and see someone worthy of the same tenderness and devotion I’ve always been so eager to give to others.

If you’re struggling with today, know that you’re not alone. Your heart is still full, even if it aches. You are still loveable, even if no one is holding you tonight. And your love—your beautiful, boundless love—is still valuable, even if, for now, the person you need to give it to most is yourself.

Happy Valentine’s Day—to me, to you, to all of us finding our way in love, in healing, in learning to cherish ourselves just as much as we cherish others.

A couple of my dear friends during a Galentine’s day celebration, where we filled our cups with great intentions and lots of love!